When you discover the person you thought you were spending the rest of your life with has decided it’s not so, your foundations are shattered. The world no longer makes sense, and this is an understatement.
If you loved deeply. It’s a lot more difficult than you’re told.
Take the premise a building is only as good as it’s foundations and your foundations have been shattered, and let’s try to work up from there.
Everything which had meaning to you has gone, everything you thought you understood is not true, and the future you had planned is now unknown.
Somewhere inside of you your brain is trying to understand what the hell has happened to the world it knew. Because it turns out it was just one big lie, and as you try to think about it, the problem becomes more complex.
Your heart is broken, and you may have a feeling it was somehow crudely ripped out of your chest, kicked around by an amateur soccer team on a rainy afternoon, on a poorly kept pitch and the whole event was sponsored by your now EX!
Your instinct and every sense your have is telling you to turn to your ex and they will console you, they are after all your safe haven, as is the life you’ve built together. Then your brain kicks in again and reminds you that you don’t have this life together anymore, and the spiral of confusion starts again.
And this is possibly one of the biggest problems. It turns out your soul mate, isn’t really your soul mate. You believed you were destined, somehow the universe brought you together, and now your faith has been challenged as well. They were supposed to be the ONE!
Right now your brain is questioning everything and it doesn’t have any answers, everything it thought it knew is wrong and it doesn’t feel safe. If it can’t figure out what happened and how it happened how is it going to keep you safe, better still, how is it going to keep you alive?
You don’t know if you can trust anything you have been told, is gravity really real anymore, and worst of all, for a while you won’t be able to trust yourself, and you will question every decision you make.
If this has happened to you, you don’t have to imagine what is like to question every decision you make. If this hasn’t happened to you. I promise you won’t be able to imagine how life shattering this is.
So how do you survive rebuild……
I’ll write about that in my next blog!